Everybody loves the cart girl, golf’s peppy purveyor of ham sandwiches and Heineken. Some even profit off her. Badgolfer.com proudly displays a gallery of “100 exclusive Beer Cart Girl photos.” BogeyPro Golf sells t-shirts with the inscription: “Classic Golf Tip No. 48: Keep Your Head Down While Ogling the Beer Cart Girl.” And golfcartgirl.com allows visitors to choose a cart girl of the month. “I am a smart, bubbly, talkative, outgoing, vivacious blond,” boasts one candidate from Hemet, Calif. “And watch out, because once you see me coming you'll most likely mess up your shot.”

Wait a minute! What happened to the other requisite qualities of a killer cart girl? Like speed of delivery! Driving expertise! And a diverse and well-stocked inventory! Shouldn’t the gals be judged not by their beauty but by the content and cleanliness of their carts? At the Miss Beer Cart Wisconsin Pageant in Slinger, Wisc., the answer is a resounding yes.

Drivers compete against one another in different events that involve speed and neatness on the beer cart, driving tests that include speed, agility and accuracy and also a question and answer session with our selected judges.

The pageant—they need another word—is scheduled for Aug. 7 with “qualifying” set for next Tuesday at a bar in Milwaukee. Can’t make it? Check out the video clips from last year’s skills contests. You’ll never look at cart girls the same way again.